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And you thought I was joking!

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

I told you there would be a quiz on the video. You didn't believe me did ya? Quit nodding your head, you didn't believe me. So here goes all you smarty pants:

1. What was Josiah spelling?

2. What's Nikki's nickname?

3. What does Michael want to study in college?

4. Why am I asking these lame questions?

I'll tell you why. It's been a sucky day and my mind just isn't working. We got hit with some horrible news. All I can say at this time is that there is being a search warrant issued and people that  hurt little kids should, in my opinion, be put to death! Imagine the worst squared.

Then there are some pretty big things happening at work. Not sure what's going to happen there, although these are some of the most rockin' clients EVER!

Then I totally turned on Diva mode at dinner tonight. Jeff had been in a confrontational meeting, I'd been dealing with The Geek Squad, and we got news that has pulled our world off of its axis. So what do we decide to do all penniless, uptight, nervous, scared, angry and whatever negative adjective you want to throw in there? We decided to go to dinner to "chill."

I'm not going to name the Australian themed restaurant we went to.

I was ok at first when the snotty little blonde bimbo came up to the table to get our drink order. As long as her over processed snarl she called hair didn't break off and land in my food I could take a little bit of attitude.

Jeff: "I'd like a large Blue Moon."

Bimbo: "We don't have it." She stares at him with a "come on idiot order something" look. She never told him what the did have.

Jeff had to ask....TWICE what they had.

She calls off 2 beers...2! Bubble thought: "WTF blondie. You're about to piss me off." Jeff chooses one, and we order dinner when she returns hours later with the beer.

Me: "I'd like the roast pork please."

Bimbo: "We don't have it" once again no suggestions, just a blank, over bleached, why are you bothering me stare.

Ok, I was pissed. Not only are the out of the very things we came for, the server is a snotty witch. Guess what came next, come on guess?

Diva Fit is what came next! I picked up the menu that had my fork and knife on it and SLAMMED it down on the table, the fork and knife went flying and I said "SHIT!" Well, I didn't really "say" it, I shouted in a way.

Bimbo: "So what do you want?"

"I DON'T WANT ANYTHING." Waa waa waa all the way home, wait isn't that some messed up nursery rhyme? At lease the little piggy in the nursery rhyme had roast beef, I was going to have nothing! It was Messed Up Diva Time. First personality-less bimbo, then no beer, then the sneer, then no pork, then the sneer, then BLAM! Diva clawed her way out of my body and FREAKED!

I don't think I've ever done that before, well at least in public. I asked for the check of all of $6 and said we'd eat elsewhere.

We're walking out of the door when this man, Larry, stops us to see if we were the ones that wanted the roast pork. Great, just great! Now I'm going to be chewed out and asked never to return to bimbo land.

"Yes," I said, "but we've decided to go somewhere else."

Larry was apologetic and regretful.  He asked for the full story and I was more than happy to tell him every last detail. Meanwhile Jeff's telling him that we had a tense business meeting. My super-human death ray vision burned a hole right through that little pre-cancerous spot on Jeff's forehead. No need for the dermatologist now buddy boy. He backed off.

I felt my blood pressure rising and I knew that meant my voice would follow suit. "This has nothing to do with the business meeting! It has EVERYTHING to do with Miss Fry Hair that seems to be wanting to smoke crack and bleach her hair more than getting a healthy gratuity!" Ok, so maybe that last sentence was embellished a wee bit.

Larry suggested a similar item and was going to pay for it. The offer was a smart move on his part, and he really seemed sincere but I declined. I don't like having things comped for me. I hate the feeling that people may assume that I was acting up only to get free food.

He continued. We stayed. Our server was incredible, the food outstanding and Diva was a bit embarrassed.




14 comments:

misssrobin July 28, 2010 at 2:28 PM  

1. poop
2. can't remember
3. criminology
4. because you've had a crappy day and don't want to think any more than is absolutely necessary.

Sorry about the day. Sorry about the server. Forget about the diva fit. And prayers are with you on the world-of-its-axis thing.

Feel free to email me if you want to vent less publicly.

Cheryl D. July 28, 2010 at 2:33 PM  

Don't be embarrassed. You are paying good money to get waited on. You deserve friendly service, not a snotty attitude. Normally, when a restaurant runs out of an item, the wait staff will announce this when handing out the menus. At the very least, fry bimbo could have been nice about it. Sometimes, you just gotta let the diva come out!

Free2bMommy July 28, 2010 at 3:22 PM  

Hey, we are all allowed a little "Diva" moment once in a while. I HAAAATE going to a restaurant and getting poor service. Like its our damn fault they are a waitress and a shitty one at that.

I have no tolerance for people who are rude and helpless for no reason.

Dee

The Ninja July 28, 2010 at 3:41 PM  

So, I could go back and watch the video again, to answer the questions, but I do remember Josiah spelling poop...and Michael and Criminal Justice and maybe Nikki and a cupcake?? Dang, I'm getting old.

Cheeseboy July 28, 2010 at 5:30 PM  

Answers to questions: I am going to go with what Miss Robin said.

I hope that B got her A fired! Please do tell us the name of unsaid Australian place.

Just Me July 28, 2010 at 6:22 PM  

All I can remember is poop. I'm sorry, I've slept since then. I'm also sorry you had a bad day yesterday and I hope everything gets better soon.

W.C.Camp July 28, 2010 at 7:13 PM  

I want to say something funny but this is too much. Sorry you had a bad day. Literally just reset and wake up tomorrow with a refreshed attitude. Hang in there. W.C.C.

Laurie Wallin July 28, 2010 at 8:59 PM  

You know, it's summer, kids are all home and I know exactly the state of mind you were talking from at that dinner table! It's like, "I dealt with idiocy all day and nobody else gets to be high maintenance, especially if I'm paying them!"

Good job not actually saying what you were fuming. I think that counts for tons!

:)

-Laurie
http://livingpower.blogspot.com

Ms. Understood July 28, 2010 at 9:42 PM  

I sometimes wonder why some people even enter service jobs when they know service is not their strong point. I don't know if she was just having a bad day, but you can't take that attitude to work with you. LOL @ your death ray stare. I hope Jeff is okay.

Anonymous,  July 28, 2010 at 10:36 PM  

Australian themed over priced sub standard food slow service crowded restaurants have been off my list of places to go for a couple years now. Glad they made you happy in the end. Its okay to get angry when its well deserved. Melissa

Classic NYer July 29, 2010 at 5:41 AM  

::pats diva on the shoulder:: there, there, it'll all be fine, babe...

Marybeth Poppins July 29, 2010 at 6:35 AM  

So sorry things are so rough for you right now. I hope everything turns out okay.

*hugs*

Marybeth
Ask a Bipolar

Unknown Mami July 29, 2010 at 1:40 PM  

I am imagining the worst squared and it is not good. I am so sorry.

Lori,  July 29, 2010 at 3:48 PM  

I don't know what happened but I offer my assistance in whatever justice needs to be administered to whomever did that horrible thing...whatever it is. As for your Diva performance...I would have done the same thing and have on a couple of occasions. Kudos!

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