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I'd Never Do It! No, Really!

Saturday, December 3, 2011

So I need a disclaimer for this post: To my Awesome psychiatrist that I saw today and to whom I revealed that I have a concealed handgun license, this is totally a coincidence! I heard the line on a TV show this evening and thought I'd see how many great friends I have, and I have a LOT! So, I have no intention of shooting anyone, ya know, just for the record.

You've all heard the saying "A good friend will help you move. A REALLY good friend will help you move a body."

I posted this as my Facebook status and my friends are hilarious! I love them. Had to share. Of course this is all hypothetical, especially if my psychiatrist happens to read this!

So here are the replies I received:

Teri ~
you know what they say "a good friend will help you move. A REALLY good friend will help you move a body." Just I have any REALLY good friends out there?
‎:-) A mulcher works better than hiding a body
call me any time Teri, I have a woodchipper =} we come!
where do ya want to take it
ya know Ron, hypothetical, just askin
Although Ron, I know this place outside of Santa Rosa, it kinda looks like a smurf house
I'll help you if you help me
It'll take a few days for me to get there tho...
An extremely good friend will help you take someone out from a few blocks away by using a sniper scope so that you don't have to deal with the body.
I like the way you think!
An excellent friend provides an airtight alibi, cell phone records, Nordstrom receipts, documentation that you did indeed purchase a waffle cone maker, and some glossies showing you kickin it with your old pal Tupac.
haha, _ _ _ _ _ ! You and _ _ _ _ _ _ _ WERE raised by the same parents! You two need to get your butts to Oregon!

LOVE it!

I get to be Madeline Kahn.

Ya gotta ask?!

I don't think you and I could carry dad, er, the body by ourselves......

Remember that old sleepover party game Light As a Feather, Stiff as a Board? We just need to get at least 4 people, so the weight will distribute evenly. I've got it all worked out. But we need some ski masks that aren't a polyblend. You know, for the pores.

I think I might be on probation LOL

Where's the body and do you have a good alibi while I move it?

you got my back, I got yours :)

You know it!

just message me where you want it dumped, and consider it moved, no questions asked

I'm lovin' my friends!

not only will I move it I have the land to hide it on and the coyotes to dispose of it

oh, coyotes, I like coyotes!

so love you!!!!

you need someone with Alzheimer's to help you, wait...who is this?        


Thanks to all the friends who have my back and made this post possible! I love you all! And worries...I would never need to move a body....I don't think so anyway? 


Snowbrush December 3, 2011 at 12:40 AM  

You have the makings of a reality TV show once you confide to all these many friends that there REALLY IS a body to be moved--maybe more than one of them.

Unknown December 3, 2011 at 4:04 AM  

hmmmm one of those lines looks vaguely like something I would say.. isn't that interesting

MarkD60 December 3, 2011 at 4:44 AM  

My plan would to be dump the body, weighted, into deep deep water very near here.

Phil December 3, 2011 at 6:50 AM  

See? Now we know for sure you CAN'T do anything bad, because, well, you've left a huge list of accomplices out in the public domain... ;)

That ought to give your psychiatrist some comfort.

Karen Mortensen December 3, 2011 at 7:23 AM  

Ha ha ha. Glad you found a good therapist. Wish I had one.

Pat December 3, 2011 at 7:46 AM  

Yep, you have GREAT friends who have your back. Oh, and they are HILARIOUS!!

Christy December 3, 2011 at 9:09 AM  

Hey I'm there! With shovel and 4WD to get to the most remote place we can find.

The Bipolar Diva December 3, 2011 at 12:04 PM  

Angel; sshhh! I can't out you! lol

The Bipolar Diva December 3, 2011 at 12:05 PM  

Phil, you do have a point there!

The Bipolar Diva December 3, 2011 at 12:05 PM  

Karen, it's hard to find a good one! Thinking of you.

Dazee Dreamer December 3, 2011 at 3:54 PM  

I can not even believe I didn't catch this one on Facebook. W.o.r.s.t....f.r.i.e.n.d.....e.v.e.r.

The Bipolar Diva December 3, 2011 at 3:58 PM  

Dazee;'re going to have to go to my profile and leave me your answer...I know it would be great!

Classic NYer December 4, 2011 at 1:41 PM  

Move a body? Maybe not... especially if it were a heavy body. But if anyone asks me, you were with me in New York all day.

Unknown February 13, 2012 at 3:45 PM  

LOL love it!! Very funny in a serious way!! :)

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